


It Could Happen

by 21derful (EssGee)



Category: The Venture Bros
Genre: Alternate Universe, Crack Treated Seriously, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Multi, Romance, Tagged NSFW
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-16
Updated: 2016-04-19
Packaged: 2018-06-02 12:25:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 16,264
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6566125
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EssGee/pseuds/21derful
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of different one-shots of different lengths, in which I attempt to craft scenarios in which various given crack ships could actually happen and make sense. This is NOT written 'properly', forgoing narrative format for a more stream-of-consciousness description of each scenario, painting the world in broad strokes describing the general things that could happen, with very few parts described in greater detail. The goal is just to convey each idea, rather than to be fully immersive.</p><p>Any given chapter may mention sexual situations in passing. Ones that go into a bit more detail are tagged in the chapter titles. None will have particularly explicit details, though.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Rusty / Sheila

So the AU premise here is going to be: Sheila never met the Monarch. Either he didn’t work up the nerve to approach her at the party, or he was caught and tossed out, or 24 convinced him to work his shift and just try to talk to her later and he never found another opportunity, or whatever. The details of why the event didn’t happen are less important than the fact that it didn’t.

As a result, Sheila continues being with Phantom Limb, feeling unappreciated and underutilized, but refusing to leave because in her mind it’s still better than being alone (probably). Or perhaps more accurately, the devil you don’t know is worse than the one you do, and she’s afraid to find out whether being alone is worse or not.

The Monarch becomes a proper villain and starts arching Venture legally regardless. He’s just a lot more reckless about it without her to rein in his ideas or remind him of regulation or provide him with more precise technical equipment. So he’s a much bigger and more dangerous nuisance, not in that he’s “capable” of more damage but just that he has zero filter on it. He’s pure chaos with nothing to temper him in any way. Formal warnings from the Guild only go so far.

Eventually, something needs to be done. Like, Venture’s OSI bodyguard is doing fine at fighting this guy off, but it’s only a matter of time before he does something really excessive. The Guild tries to revoke his arching rights, but he doesn’t care and goes rogue. 

He’s not actually that strong and a whole team of Wasps seems excessive so they start looking into any potential alternatives for dealing with the pest problem before resorting to the big guns, and they realize that Phantom Limb is both the Monarch’s former boss and has at least some sort of history with the Venture family via the Boys’s Brigade, so they ask if he can try to either mediate or take the Monarch down. A petty task, really, but PL supposes he may as well.

It’s been a few years since Sheila and the Monarch would have met, and in that time she’s gone from dissatisfied to outright resentful, but she’s still too stubborn and codependent to just leave. All the same, she’s starting to hate Hamilton and everything she associates with him, including the Guild.

Phantom Limb stakes out the Venture Compound one day with his Queen and a small force of his best Shadowmen. While waiting for the Monarch to show up, Sheila makes a few suggestions which are brushed off and disregarded, and it’s more than she can take. She storms off, saying she’ll just wait inside, hoping he understands that means she’s pissed and trying to punish him. He doesn’t; he agrees it’s probably safer in there and she should go make herself comfortable while he handles the real work. This only pisses her off more.

 

Inside, she meets Rusty properly. He seems okay, if really annoying, instantly hitting on her and focusing on her appearance and talking himself up. But… eh. She supposes her outfit doesn’t really help, and that much is Hamilton’s fault. Also, being here. Everything seems to be Hamilton’s fault. Besides, she  _ was _ kind of a fan of the Rusty Venture cartoon as a kid, and while she’s more than a little disillusioned at what he became, she figures there are worse ways to kill the next few hours than talking to him. At least it’s company who is actually interested in what she has to say.

So she does her best to put aside her annoyance, and starts trying to have an actual conversation. She’d rather hear him go on about himself than “compliment” her, and tries to keep the topics veered in that direction, which is fine with him. He’s never needed much encouragement to talk about himself. 

He talks about stuff that happened to him as a kid, and realizes she’s at least a passing fan, and they end up discussing some differences between Rusty’s real life and the cartoon, which starts putting into perspective for her how messed up he probably is from all of it. Not in full scope or anything, of course, not yet. It’s just a little seed contrasting against her first impression of “wow, what happened?”, shifting more to “…oh wow, yeah, that would make sense”.

He talks about stuff he’s working on right now, too, though of course he doesn’t mention most of it he’s been “working on” for ten years at this point, or it’s not exactly coming together like he’d hoped. She doesn’t want to step on any toes and tries to just nod and act generally interested, but finally he mentions one problem he’s having and she can’t help herself. “Why don’t you just [answer that’s obvious in retrospect]?”

And Rusty sits staring at her, stunned and not quite speechless, stuttering that that’s– that’s a really good idea. …How did she know about that??

She admits she’s actually really into science and engineering, which doesn’t quite open but slightly cracks the floodgate in getting her griping about how she doesn’t get to use any of that where she is now.

He starts running more ideas by her, and she’s not as certain on all of them and says she’d need to see others for herself, but he can tell she has a lot of good ideas at least in theory, even if some would need to be tested, and Rusty’s whole perception of her is just rapidly shifting to this state of sheer awe. Is he… SURE that this is that Guild guy’s girlfriend and not some divine muse sent to inspire him??? No. No he really is not.

 

Finally, the Monarch shows up. His henchmen engage some of the shadowmen, and he manages to slip past the bulk of the brawl to Dr. Venture!! Rusty jumps behind the couch, but Sheila leaps into action. She’s not as strong at this point as we’ve seen her, but just as nimble, and the Monarch isn’t exactly at the top of his game since he really didn’t expect to be fighting her and still kind of has his old crush. But… but, well, she’s between him and Venture, so? So basically she ends up kicking his ass, albeit it kind of slowly. Her blows aren’t doing a ton of damage, but she’s getting in plenty of them and he can’t touch her.

Their fight is interrupted by Brock and Phantom Limb rushing in almost simultaneously. Brock tackles the Monarch to the ground. He’s handcuffed and handed over to PL to be taken into Guild custody and await a trial. When the Monarch struggles, PL effectively tases him, taking a little too much satisfaction in doing so.

Rusty comes out of hiding and starts awkwardly trying to tell her how impressive that fight was– to Sheila’s relief, honestly, as she was feeling pretty frustrated at having her victory snatched away by the Big Strong Men  _ as fucking usual. _

 

PL tells her it’s time to leave, come along, dear.

And Sheila looks at him, and Rusty.. and back at Hamilton… And turns to Rusty with a sweet smile. “Say. Any chance you could use a lab partner?”

“UHH– I- I uh– S-s-sure?? I suppose I uh…”

And PL lightly scowls, commenting she doesn’t have time for another job. “You’re right,” she says to him, smile still pasted on for a moment. Then a deep glare overtakes her as she seethes, “So I quit.”

“You  _ what?” _

They start getting into an argument, and Rusty- bless his heart- he tries to stick up for her. If the lady says she wants to– PL threatens him with a lightning-flashing fist and he kind of shrinks back and might be having trouble not pissing himself but he’s still…  _ technically _ standing his ground barely. But that prompts Brock to step in. “Is there gonna be a problem here?”

Reluctantly, Phantom Limb tells him no and leaves, Monarch in tow. The remaining Monarch henchmen are either apprehended or scatter and hide. (21 and 24 make it out as always.)

Sheila thanks them both, then turns to Rusty and coyly says she kiiiiind of needs a place to stay, now, too. Of course Rusty readily volunteers.  

So now she’s living in the Venture Compound, and helping Rusty science.

She makes it pretty clear off the bat she’s not interested in dating or sleeping with him, to Rusty’s slightly bitter disappointment. But… hey. She’s hot and an asset and apparently is willing to work for nothing but room and board? He can definitely work with that.

Plus, partially because she has zero problems manipulating people for her own gain and doesn’t want to risk him changing his mind, and partially because he does seem like a sweet enough guy and she guesses it’s not really fair to write him off entirely, she makes the case she just got out of a  _ very _ exhausting relationship so she’s not saying he doesn’t have a chance, she just… needs a little time to breathe and recover. 

…And, hey, maybe she might not entirely mind a little flirting? She can probably deal with that. She ends up regretting that offer slightly, because he’s really bad at it and doesn’t always read signals of when to quit very well, but really it’s just kind of mildly annoying and if it gets her a place to stay where she can be around people and have a job doing things she’s actually good at, she can certainly tolerate it. And even if she doesn’t always enjoy his attempts, she does enjoy her own and watching him get flustered. Those are rarer but having license to do it when she feels like it is fun. So that’s a plus.

Also the bodyguard– Brock, was it?– is kind of an ass, but also  _ has _ a really nice ass. Like he keeps making shitty comments about her voice and is kind of rude to her, but again, it’s something she can deal with. He’s pretty quiet most of the time so as long as she doesn’t engage him directly it doesn’t come up very often, and hot  _ damn _ does he make for some nice eye candy. So that’s also a plus.

She meets the boys, who at this point are about 9 or 10. And… really a bit too young for her taste and she just kind of tries to avoid them and keeps telling them  _ no, _ she is not their new mommy. (Rusty won’t admit that makes him slightly sad too.)

Of course, one of the other first things she did was go shopping for some proper clothes and ditch the Queen Etheria dress and title.

She tries going by Sheila for a few days, but even though it’s still her name and she doesn’t inherently have a problem with it, the fact that Hamilton was the only person to consistently call her that for so long makes her feel weird when other men do it. The boys calling her Miss Sheila seems fine, so she lets them keep doing that. But for Rusty and Brock, she asks how they’d feel about her going by... Dr. Girlfriend? … No she’s still not Rusty’s girlfriend, and definitely not Brock’s. …But, well, she’s sciencing, and Rusty’s a doctor, and she’s technically a doctor, and it’s… it’s kind of ironic and playing to the stereotype, okay? She thinks it’s amusing and likes it and coming up with weird persona names is just a Guild habit she guesses it might take her a while to break.

Brock especially finds that weird, but they both just kind of shrug it off and, yeah, okay, whatever I guess. Rusty might take a little more pleasure than he should in calling her ~~ _ Dr. Girlfriend _ ~~ even when she’s made it clear that’s not the intent. It’s just self-indulgent and there’s no harm in a little fantasizing, right?

 

So that’s Sheila’s life for a while. Doing science. Clashing a little bit with everyone. But Rusty’s still a pretty nice guy when he’s not being too forward or having a really irritable day or the like. And Brock seems pretty okay when he can bite his tongue. And the boys are… Well they’re kids, and she definitely never wanted kids. But at least they’re not  _ her _ kids. She doesn’t  _ have _ to deal with them (usually). Which makes her a little more capable of appreciating their shenanigans, since she can just “lol nope” and leave if they get to be too much to deal with.

Also, Phantom Limb starts arching Rusty, because of course he does. But he’s  _ professional _ about it so he’s a nuisance, but like. A nuisance that shows up at a pretty regularly scheduled hour to do things entirely within regulation. And Sheila super does not want to deal with him, but having SOMEONE to fight seems to make Rusty feel special and important, and that’s….

That’s really really dumb but kind of endearing. Like he’s the heir of this huge famous company (which has started improving quite a bit since she came aboard) and a child star beloved around the world but he starts feeling insecure if he doesn’t have someone making a villain monologue on his lawn at least once a month. What a dork.

 

( Also, after spending a while in Guild jail, the Monarch is deemed too dangerous to let go unchecked but not really a prominent enough offender to be put to death or anything extreme like that, so he’s just thrown in regular prison for a few years and issued a restraining order. He hasn’t been arching Venture as long at this point, and has only that weaker hate motivating him as opposed to both hate and love in the True Timeline, so he doesn’t work as hard on breaking out. 21 and 24 keep in touch, and through them he learns someone else started arching Venture, and while he’s jealous as shit, he’s also a little satisfied that at least  _ someone _ is making that guy’s life hell because he deserves it. So he just kind of accepts his hand and spends his time quietly planning.)

 

So the longer Sheila’s here, the more the entire situation grows on her.

She gets to know Rusty better, sees more of what makes him tick. She gets better at predicting his moods and being extra encouraging when he’s feeling down and either teasing him or egging him on when he’s feeling extra full of himself and hanging back and giving him space when he’s prone to lashing out, and she’d honestly be lying if she said she didn’t take at least a tiny bit of satisfaction in mastering this art, like eternally working on a complex puzzle.

The things she found annoying before start to grow on her a little, too. His flirting is pathetic enough it’s actually kind of cute- and also he seems to be doing it a lot less, which helps with seeing it in a more positive light when he does. His massive ego, which she’s realized by this point is half facade and half sincere delusion, can also be really cute, and it can be pretty fun to snark at him or to just play up his fantasies even more and watch him strut around feeling like he’s hot shit.

She also understands more and more how broken he is, and how bad he actually is at most science. He’s got decent ideas and can take most of them farther than the average person could but fine-tuning all the details and getting a properly working product is a different story. She finds new things in his lab and asks what they do to find he doesn’t know a lot of the time, or knows what it does but not why, and eventually catches on to just how much is shit his dad made that he’s been trying to figure out ever since, etc. 

And basically-- on several levels, between the knowledge and emotional support and everything-- he  _ really REALLY  _ needs her, and there is nothing more validating to her than feeling needed.

Over time, Brock eases up more and more on the jabs, which is nice on its own. But he also starts gaining a lot of respect for her. Usually when someone other than PL turns up, she joins the action if she’s not too busy or her hand is forced, and he respects her skill in that regard a lot. As she fights more often rather than just sitting around, she gets stronger, too, which makes her that much more impressive, etc. But also, Brock opens up to her eventually that she really seems to be helping Doc a lot, and it’s… really nice seeing him so happy. So… Thank you for that.

The boys, no matter how much she tries to remind herself she wasn’t going to get too involved, grow on her a lot, too. Dean is such a bright kid, and Hank has such a vivid imagination, and… Really? Really is no one else going to correct them on that completely ridiculous assumption they’ve– okay she’ll do it then. So she ends up kind of being the voice of reason and helping them not to be so gullible. 

And Brock’s content to just do whatever his job requires and Rusty is largely reclusive but Sheila needs to get out of the house sometimes, and… Well, she doesn’t mind making trips alone as long as they’re not too long, but some company can be nice, too, and she figures the boys really could stand to get out in a NORMAL context for a change, too. Like, going shopping or going to a movie rather than flying to the Hidden Temple of Lotsacurses or whatever.

So she starts spending more time with them, especially as they get older and get less annoying, her own influence contributing a lot to the less annoying part, too. And… as much as she hates to admit it, they kind of remind her of her Moppets, in a good way, and minus a lot of the less savory stuff. They’re like… like young, sweeter, purer, non-stabbity versions of her Moppets. (Who may also be picking up a cursing habit from her a little but sssh try not to do that around your dad.)

 

But as much as the boys are pleasant company, they’re not exactly suited for everything she’d like to do. So at some point, she decides to invite Rusty and Brock to go out. She doesn’t really care what they do, she just thinks it’d be nice to spend some time with the adults in her life outside of a home or work setting? They could have dinner or go to a bar or club or whatever, really. They’re not really sure what to make of the offer but… well, she makes a point that they don’t get out much in mundane ways, so why not? It’s really fun and everyone enjoys themselves.

That becomes a semi-regular thing. Not super often at first. It’s like a month after that outing before another, then another three weeks before the next. But it’s looking like they’re getting more on-board with it.

Occasionally they hit the bar, and Sheila’s perfectly fine with most of the attention she’s getting, either because it’s actually desired or because she takes a little pleasure in being the unobtainable goddess in a setting like this, depending on the guy(s, and a handful of girls from time to time) in question. Brock always leaves with someone. Sheila sometimes does.

It takes her probably one or two trips out too many to realize Rusty never does.

 

One night, she’s met a nice (and by nice she mostly means extremely attractive) guy, and is going to tell them she’s leaving when she realizes Rusty is even more bitter than usual. Brock’s already gone, and he’s really not looking forward to heading home alone yet again, and it finally dawns on her that he’s struck out every single time they’ve gone out, and now she feels bad that she and Brock kept insisting this place was great.

She tells the guy she’s gonna have to give him a rain check, and ends up spending the evening hanging out with Rusty instead. He tells her she didn’t have to– he’s realized by now she’s not interested, and he doesn’t need her pity. She insists it’s not– ENTIRELY pity, at least. Wait that came out wrong, it’s-… She actually does enjoy spending time with him, though. That’s  _ why _ she likes coming out with him and Brock rather than by herself. She knows one way or another she’ll have a good time.

Of course, all Rusty takes from that is A) he’s just part of a group with Brock, and B) he’s basically her fallback.

… Okay so she can’t really argue with the latter but when he says it like that she suddenly feels a little bad about it, uh…

HEY. You know what? How about next time, the two of them go out somewhere? No Brock, just Dr. Venture and Dr. Girlfriend.

Rusty is intrigued but confused. Just for clarification (that’s the only reason, definitely), he asks if she means it as friends or co-workers or…

“You can think of it as a date if you want,” she tells him with a smile. She shrugs and adds, “But really, I don’t think we need to put a label on it. We can just try to have fun and see what happens.”

“… I’d like that,” he says.

They hang around just a little longer, then have a pleasant conversation in the taxi on the way home. It’s late when they get there, and both are slightly drunk and pretty ready to crash.

“Night Doc,” she says.

“Good night, Dr. Girlfriend,” he replies.

She regards him a moment, hesitantly, before- perhaps aided a bit by her inebriated state, she decides, “Just Sheila is fine.” Then she kisses him on the cheek and smiles at him before heading to her room, leaving him stunned.

 

The next few days are really awkward, mostly because Rusty makes them awkward. She’s just trying to smile at him and make pleasant conversation while they work, but he is Very Business Only in the lab, quick to avoid more idle topics, and just in general stuttering and blushing constantly, and it’s… She’s constantly sighing and rolling her eyes. It’s kind of cute, kind of sweet, but really frustrating. She thought they were pretty comfortable around each other at this point, given she’s lived here over a year now, but okay.

Honestly, she could deal with him being flustered, but then he doesn’t even seem to want to discuss date plans??? Wtf. She tries to confront him about it and he ducks out like a coward, leaving her fuming.

So she does the next best thing and confronts Brock about it. She’s expecting just to fume, but then can pretty quickly tell he Knows Something. She tries to pry it out of him, but he’s not budging. She gets more forceful, or tries to. All 5 feet of her glaring up at him, two feet taller and over three times her weight. He’s not intimidated. She attempts to shove him and he subdues her pretty easily, but she manages to slip out of his grasp pretty easily, too. There’s fire in her eyes and he knows he could take her (and he.. kind of…  _ really _ wants to, in a  _ different _ way, even though he still has reservations in that regard too), but he doesn’t really feel like hurting anyone or dealing with this right now so he just. Fine.

So he tells her a little bit about Doc’s love life, namely that it’s been all but non-existent. And the last girl he was with–… He isn’t actually lying when he says Rusty got her pregnant. He’s just… relying on her to assume that means the boys’s mom given the single girl since then… Yeah Brock’s not about to start telling her about  _ that _ debacle. And then briefly tells her about Myra. So Doc doesn’t exactly have a lot of… experience with these kind of things, and what he does has been less than ideal, and.. honestly?

Brock would be willing to bet money that Doc is nervous because he’s trying to come up with something to impress her.

That’s-… again, a little pathetic but kind of endearing. So she decides to cut him some slack (and also resists following up that brief tension a minute ago and flirting with Brock if only because she doesn’t want to start sending mixed signals here).

 

Sure enough, she gives him some space and when it finally comes time for their date, Rusty has this huge plan all set up. He won’t tell her what all it is, but suddenly he’s full of bravado again and going on about what a spectacular evening she can expect. She insists he really didn’t have to and something simple would have been more than okay, but he insists that yes he did and won’t elaborate further.

First, they head to a really fancy restaurant, which kind of makes her roll her eyes… but then they don’t eat there. Rusty picks up food he’d already ordered, and packs it in a basket. Then he takes her to a beautiful private garden he’s rented for the evening, and they have a picnic there while… not actually watching the sun set, because the glare is awful until it gets low enough. But sitting with their backs to it and just watching the sky shift and admiring the scenery and enjoying each other’s company. 

She admits she was a little worried when the evening started, but this is actually really nice. From the way she talked about her ex, it seemed like overly Prim And Proper things might be a little offputting for her, but he wanted to treat her to a nice meal anyway. She’s…  _ really _ pleased by that level of foresight. …He admits it was kind of Brock’s idea. Or at least, Brock brought up the restaurant being a bad idea. But  _ he _ was the one who thought of the compromise and also implemented it all. Sheila can only chuckle.

As it starts getting dark, she wonders if they should head home, but Rusty insists not yet. …It gets a little later, and it’s starting to get cold, but he says just a little longer. Just as she’s starting to get bored and considering insisting, a boom catches her ear and she realizes why the delay.

The display is far enough away as to not be overwhelming (or have the risk with pyrotechnics in the garden, she presumes), but close enough to still be really stunning. As she watches, she asks, “Isn’t it the wrong time of year for fireworks?”

“I may have… pulled a few strings,” he says, with his best smarmy grin and eyebrow waggle.

She snorts and rolls her eyes. “More like bribed them.”

“Whaaat?” he asks, not in a manner that professes innocence, but rather inquires what the problem with that would be. She honestly can’t think of one and just smiles, giving him a playful nudge before settling down and snuggling against him.

They watch in silence for a few minutes, before Sheila finally admits, “They’re beautiful.”

“Not as beautiful as you,” Rusty retorts, and she smirks. Another minute goes by, and he adds, “You know, you can’t always see them like this. But sparks fly just as much every moment I’m with you~”

She  _ can’t _ . Her hand flies to her mouth and she still can’t quite suppress a small snort, and as she tries to insist she’s not laughing at him, said laughter seeps into her words.

Rusty is… a little hurt, but she continues insisting no, really. It’s just… SO cheesy, she can’t take it seriously. It’s adorable but she can’t listen with a straight face.

So he gets more sincere. Takes her hands, professes what a massive impact she’s been in his life, how grateful he is for everything she’s done and everything she is, how the past year has been the best of his life BY FAR even if they don’t count tonight, even without dating; he tells her how just being near her has been the greatest gift he could imagine, and that that’s why he had to do everything he could to make sure tonight was perfect– even if it could never be as perfect as she is. He just needed to do something to show her how deeply grateful he is for everything.

…

She’s speechless, and just stares at him for two solid minutes, processing everything. He starts averting his gaze, getting increasingly worried about this response, until finally she says, “Rusty?”

His eyes move back up to her. “Ye–” 

She cuts him off with a kiss, and he embraces her. And this still feels so cliche, and she feels a little ridiculous for being so thoroughly swept off her feet, but hot damn if she hasn’t been swept off her feet. They make out for a while, and as things start moving farther, Rusty is briefly concerned that maybe this isn’t the best place, but-… Well, uh. He’s both really excited and afraid of losing his chance if he doesn’t take it immediately, and she’s just a full-on exhibitionist, so they end up having sex right there in the garden.

It’s predictably underwhelming for her, but that’s fine. He just needs more practice, she thinks, and she will be happy to help with that.

Cuddling up to him, she murmurs, “Maybe you should call me Dr.  _ Girlfriend _ after all~”

 

The next few months are wonderful. She still has her own room and retreats to it when she needs space at any time, but she’s sleeping there less and less. Rusty is much happier and more productive all around, buzzing on the New Relationship Energy they’ve got going. They alternate between going out for general Adult Time with Brock– which still includes the occasional bar or club but starts shifting more heavily to dinner and movies and random silly acitivities like bowling or mini golf (which aren’t reeaally Sheila’s thing but kind of fun occasionally if she lets herself indulge in how ridiculous it feels, and they take the boys sometimes for those, too, which is fun)– and going out just the two of them. Nothing so big as that first night, but always sweet.

She starts encouraging Rusty and Brock to go out more on their own, too, insisting Guys’ Night is good for them, and not wanting Brock to feel like he’s being pushed away or anything. Neither of them really felt like that or think it’s “necessary” but they agree it sounds like a nice idea anyway.

“Just don’t be too jealous if I come home with a hot supermodel,” Rusty teased her one such night.

“Oh, by all means, if you can land one!” she shrugged off with a smile. …He wasn’t sure how to take that.

Moving on, though. Business is good. The boys are doing great. There continue to be mildly annoying Guild threats. Rusty seems less eager to go on crazy adventures, lately, which is nice. Brock is a little torn, itching for a fight but also finding it hard to complain about more time to relax and spend time with the boys.

 

If she has a single major complaint, it’s that… Well, Rusty has certainly been getting better in bed; he really has. But he’s still having a lot of trouble keeping up with her, and just in general isn’t as ‘adventurous’ as she is, and ah… she might… She wants to sleep with other people? She finally manages to approach him about this one night, and it causes a pretty big fight. It takes her what feels like forever, and what is actually several days, but she finally manages to convince him that it doesn’t in any way reflect how she feels about him, that it’s not a gateway to testing out her options until she finds someone better, etc. It’s just an isolated need she’d like to find other ways of meeting.

So they talk that over, and lay down ground rules, like how many nights she can spend away from home, and things Rusty is and isn’t comfortable hearing about, and so-on. Mostly it seems pretty reasonable and she’s very happy to accommodate whatever he needs to feel most comfortable with this.

… Also Brock is off-limits. –Where did that come from?? She didn’t say– She didn’t have to. She is attracted to men in general, and it is therefore an immutable law of the universe that she would find Brock attractive, so just… He’s not saying Brock would have been her first pick (,, he might have, she mentally admits), but just in case, establishing that. Brock is off-limits. His reasons are super personal and he doesn’t want to discuss it.

She’s more than a little frustrated by multiple facets of that, but supposes it’s fair enough. As much as she loves super open communication in theory, there’s a ton of shit she keeps private. It’s fair he has a little, too. So overall, when she ignores that little frustration, she’s just thrilled that he was willing to give any ground at all on this.

Actually putting it into practice is really rough on him at first, but as time goes on and he sees through hard evidence that she actually is respecting all his requests and doesn’t mind making adjustments where needed and she keeps coming home to him and also if anything seems more passionate than ever about their own relationship but in ways that also put less pressure on him??? He still has issues sometimes but he is definitely a lot more okay with it than he thought he’d be.

 

Really, just all around in all aspects of their lives, everything is going great until the boys die.

 

AND SHEILA IS DEVASTATED. It was such a freak accident and she’s so angry that she doesn’t even have anyone to blame and–

WHY are you two not devastated!???!??!???

,,,, yyy—yyyeah, they’ve…. been through this… before,,,

Rusty and Brock take turns trying to explain that this is the fourth time the boys have died, now, and they show her the clone tanks, and she’s– APPALLED.

They have the biggest fight they will ever have about this as she tries to explain everything HORRIBLE about this situation, not even able to articulate herself for the fact that she’s still bawling and grieving and struggling to get through a linear thought.

But ultimately it boils down to Rusty asking, “Well wha’d’you want me to DO? Leave them DEAD?”

…. Well. No. She guesses…. she guesses not. B–but it’s not the same? ….but it’s. Something… It’s  _ something _ and she just… She didn’t realize how much she loved these– loved  _ those _ – boys until they were gone.

So Rusty picks two fresh clones, and starts loading up the memory synapses. He’s still way too calm about this for her taste, but she doesn’t say anything; she just seethes internally. He asks if there’s anything she wants him to alter while he’s got their memories here.

… WHAT???? This keeps getting worse, what the HELL kind of fucked up thing is that to ask???

Rusty shrugs and explains he and Brock have done it a few times, now. He figures since they have the ability to do so, it doesn’t HURT to erase a few of the boys’s worst memories or “fix” a few mistakes from their perception, etc. Like one time Rusty forgot their birthday. Remembering that doesn’t really achieve anything except making them feel bad, right? They shouldn’t have to dwell on that just because Rusty is a fuck-up who loses track of time, should they?

… Okay, so she can see his point. Changing too much can really alter who a person is, but she can see how a few little things might do more good than harm. So she gives it some thought.

And there was one thing… she had kind of been considering offering the boys she’d known. But she didn’t know how to bring it up then, and she still didn’t know how she would. But she…. “Don’t… make them, or anything,” she starts. That would make it weird. “But is there any way you could plant the idea that… if they  _ want _ to… it’s okay for them to call me Mom?”

Rusty stops working, and slowly turns to her. She blushes uncomfortably and looks away. Rusty wants to get up, wants to hold her, wants to kiss her… but he can tell she’s not harboring the most positive feelings toward him, at the moment, and instead just nods. “Yeah… I think I can do that.”

 

The new boys are so similar, Sheila can almost forget they ever died. Almost. Aside from the reminder when they use her new title– and they do, sheepishly and sort of seldomly, but they do– there are subtle differences. This Hank is slightly more cautious than the last one. This Dean has all the same interests, but the strength of them is distributed a little differently. It’s all so small she can almost pretend it’s just normal change over time.

But she knows it’s not.

And at first, she’s a little standoffish to the new boys as a result. She tries not to make it obvious and is very kind to their faces, but avoids them more than she had been, much like when she first arrived. She avoids Rusty for a while, too, outside of Strictly Business.

She takes a little more comfort from Brock. She’s still none too happy with him being so complacent with this, but at least from what she can tell he’s just going along with it. This wasn’t his idea. He’s just coping, same as her.

For a while, Brock tries to be… well, as comforting as he can with his usual level of aloofness. But at one point, he finally tells her, look. You know Doc’s just coping, too, right? He probably feels worse about all the deaths than anyone; he’s just trying to do what he can to make it right.

And worse than the fact that she knows he’s right is the fact that on some level she knew that already. But having it laid out in words makes it more real and she’s gotta deal with it.

So she just kind of withdraws from everyone for a few more days to think it over. She still doesn’t feel right about treating life as replaceable. Having these boys is… wonderfully comforting, but it still doesn’t entirely change that they’re not the same, that the boys she’d fallen in love with were gone, that their lives were still valuable.

Just like these new lives were valuable. And like every moment spent with any loved one was valuable. And being bitter over things that couldn’t be changed actually seemed like a really poor way to spend the limited time they all had, didn’t it?

So she resolves to forgive Rusty, tries her best to understand, and starts doing her best to rekindle all her relationships, intent on valuing their time to the fullest rather than waste it wishing.

 

And value it she does. When these boys die two years later, her gut still turns, but she takes some comfort knowing that she rarely wasted time- that what time they had was meaningful. And that, even if it’s not  _ exactly _ the same, a large part of them does still live on. Because having been around them that long, she realized that even though they expressed things a little differently, thought a little differently, they shared so many of the experiences that made Hank and Dean Hank and Dean that it felt entirely unfair to call them anyone else.

At this point, she’s a pretty proper member of the Venture family. By the third death she sees, her reaction is more akin to “oh what the hell, that was only six months” than the mourning she’d felt the first time. And part of her feels like a horrible person for adjusting to this, but this is her life now.

 

At this point, she’s been living with Rusty for about four years, and dating him for nearly three. She adores the boys, who call her mom about as often as not, now. Brock has become a very good friend and confidant, and it’s even gotten easier to pretend she doesn’t want to tap that. She still does, but she sees him first and foremost as a friend, who happens to be pretty attractive and who she wouldn’t mind sleeping with if the offer was on the table, as opposed to someone she fiercely just wanted to drag into bed.

She’s even gotten to a point where she’s happy and confident enough with who she is and where she is in life that she’s started joining Brock when Hamilton comes to arch. She’s not afraid of him getting into her head anymore and looking at him doesn’t make her feel nauseous. She can get out there and toss banter and kick ass and feel pretty good about it. In fact, last time, he seemed like he was kind of getting into the banter, too. That might be nice, actually. Having a relationship dynamic where their tension could be put to constructive use and they didn’t have to deal with each other at the end of the day. She’s happy about this.

 

Then the Monarch gets out of prison. What? You thought I wrote him out of the story? Of course not~

All this time, 21 and 24 have kept in touch. As with the True Timeline when he went to jail, they are the only henchmen to stay loyal, and they ended up going to a former hench support group, where Gary gets the bright idea that “hench for yourself” means “become a supervillain”. But this time, without the Monarch breaking out of jail just afterward, he has time to dwell on it.

He talks to the Monarch about these aspirations when he can. His plans are mostly half-baked and fantasy-heavy, but the Monarch… The Monarch has been seething, and is significantly better at the Villain Game. Being in prison gives him a lot of time to think, and tempers his patience a lot. His natural propensity for cunning is developed tenfold when stopping to think his plans through becomes not a rarity but a necessity to pass the time. He relays instructions to 21– or rather, to The Viceroy.

And the Viceroy carries them out to the best of his ability, which isn’t very well at first. But he’s eager to please, and craves approval, and works harder. And slowly, he starts getting stronger, more competent. He starts setting up plans that won’t pay off for years but require groundwork in place.

24 is inspired by 21′s steady transformation, and iiiiisn’t really that eager to put himself on the front lines again but he starts training too and gets at least kind of stronger and faster and it makes him feel pretty good about himself.

So when the Monarch finally gets out, the three of them become a royalty-themed team: The Monarch, The Viceroy, and The Other Guy, who refused to pick a name when prompted because he said this theme was dumb, so the other two chose a name for him.

Occasionally, if they do the whole Team Rocket style “announcing we’re here” villain schtick, Other Guy introduces himself as “Super King, the best one of the three!” Monarch tells him it’s too late to change his name, and Viceroy tells him that while he always approves of a good reference it would just be really confusing to have both a king and a monarch, sorry. He keeps doing it because they’re all dorks.

Incidentally, the Viceroy at this point is like…….  _ 21 hahahahahah _ I did not intend that. But yeah I… Attempting to keep a general timeline in mind here, he’s roughly 21 years old when he stops being Henchman 21. The point was, this transformation is not yet as extreme as the one he undergoes in the True Timeline- it’s slower and the end result is a liiittle less pronounced. Also, he’s still very much a kid at heart, even more than we’re used to. But he’s also been traumatized less and spent not nearly as much time feeling like a failure before growing really competent, so he’s still a pretty formidable badass.

 

The trio starts arching Venture, but no more guns blazing bravado. They’re smart and subtle about it. And since the Monarch still has his whole restraining order, he doesn’t do anything too close or direct. They do things like vandalize his property when he’s not home, and steal his identity to rack up debt, and start believable rumors about most but not all of his latest inventions, then praise a rare few, leading to the illusion that they are not biased and thus lending credence to the negative claims. 

MEANWHILE, they also get a proper arch enemy, who they openly combat, providing themselves with an alibi of sorts, because who would have time to do such petty pointless stuff on the side while arching someone else full time?

A very, very devoted nemesis is who.

 

Sheila becomes a little obsessive trying to figure out and combat their mysterious assailant, and Rusty is pretty annoyed as well, but.. Really, while both can get worked up about it and it certainly ruins a lot of days, they both agree they shouldn’t let it ruin their life, and do their best not to dwell (…TOO much) between bouts of arching.

 

And that largely becomes their pattern for years.

They’re not without disagreements. Sometimes Sheila gets way more stressed than she ‘should’ about the harassment. If ever the boys die or even just get injured due to negligence rather than accident, that tends to cause a fight that can last anywhere from a few days to a few weeks. Sometimes Rusty gets jealous of her sexual escapades and they have to work that out sometimes. But overall, at least most of the time, they are very happy together and run a fairly successful business and have a very lovely family and are super cute babbies<3

Rusty spends years ‘planning’ to propose but continuously chickening out because he’s not convinced he’s come up with anything as perfect as she deserves so he keeps putting it off indefinitely.

Also the boys grow up with a mom who loves them and helps make them more world-wise and gives them dating advice that is actually good and they become relatively functional adults as a result.

Hamilton has started arching Sheila more than Rusty, and respects her more as an opponent than he ever did as an accomplice, and they’re both very happy with that arrangement. He’s not necessarily ‘over’ her, but having her as an important person in his life is still satisfying and there’s something about the forbidden/unobtainable angle of having her as an enemy that fuels his fire that much more and she appreciates this dynamic as well and it’s nice.

 

Also, the Viceroy and the Monarch still end up falling for each other, and Viceroy and Other Guy are still QP partners, and Other Guy never dies in a car intentional, and Monarch and Other Guy end up getting really close too and they’re not actually sure what they’d label it as but they’re pretty okay with not knowing, really. And they end up being a really cute and also very formidable triad of sorts and are also very happy.

  
  
Everything is nice and no one has to be thrown under the bus to make this work. :'D


	2. Hamilton/Sheila/Malcolm [NSFW]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Doubles as a college AU, kind of.

In this AU, Sheila- not even 20, an innocent student with no concept of "arching" or being "professionally" evil- meets Malcolm- upperclassman but still a kid himself, not yet a villain, not yet the Monarch- while both are still in college, probably during the time after Rusty left school but before the Monarch had started moonlighting/henching and well before he graduated.

Sheila is still super into her hot professor, and they've been flirting pretty heavily any time they've found a moment alone for a while, now.

...But like. This Malcolm kid. He's _super_ cute, and seems so passionate about everything he does, and she's kind of a sap for the whole suffering poet angle, and also he's a lot closer to her age. Not that Hamilton's age is a deal-breaker, but she'd be lying if she said being nearly double her own didn't make her feel at least slightly awkward at times. The idea of someone she could actually be seen with without getting weird looks (or, you know, _him fired_ ) is definitely appealing.

… But she _really really_ likes Professor Fantamos.

So. You know what? Having to choose is a really stupid concept anyway. If she likes them both, why shouldn't she at least try to make that work? Screw your standards. She's gonna try to figure this out.

However, she does get a pretty strong impression that both of them can be possessive. Which… she maybe _kind of_ gets? It's not like she's never been jealous. It's just… not nearly as common for her as most people, apparently. Still, she understands enough to know this isn't something she can just spring on them. She'll definitely need to get them to know each other, first. Her being interested in someone each of them knows sounds less threatening than some mysterious stranger, right? Right.

So she starts hanging out with Malcolm a lot more, 'dating' in the loosest sense of the term. They go out on various typical-date activities together, but they agree it's just casual for now. They're not super serious, not 'exclusive'.

He thinks she's amazing and wouldn't mind at all if they were, but it's also pretty damn cool that she can play his "wingman" if he ever finds someone else attractive or whatever. Like it's nice having someone who likes him and likes making out with him and doesn't ask for anything but his company. He has a feeling he's going to want more eventually but for now this is great.

 

Then one day, after they've been not-actually-together for a few weeks, she's like, _hey_ , you should come study with me~ One of my professors lets me use his classroom during his downtime; it's really nice and quiet and he's really great and helpful. I think you'd like him~

And she makes sort of a big deal about how great this professor is, trying just to talk him up, but it kind of backfires and makes Malcolm really nervous.

Hamilton, meanwhile, has caught onto the fact she's been spending an awful lot of time with some boy, lately, so the moment they walk in, his eyes are burning into Malcolm like laser vision.

Granted, he understands just how far out of bounds Sheila is for him- that he has no room to complain; that no matter how fond he is of her and despite the fact the feeling is mutual, he can't lay a finger on her for at least several years. _He's willing to wait._

Still, in the meantime, he supposes it might even be a good thing she has someone else, to keep people from asking questions. … All the same, this little _shitstain_ had better watch his step, and know his place.

So Hamilton is very nice to Malcolm. Entirely _too_ nice, in the most condescending and judgmental way possible, backhanded compliments and all. Malcolm notices. Sheila doesn't.

She thinks that went pretty well. He comments that it was like having to meet her dad.

,,, Nooooot the effect she was going for, but once he says it she can't even argue because he literally is _old enough_ to be her dad and ...ugh wow she has fucking awful taste in men.

"Or your grandpa," Malcolm mutters. "God I hate old people like that." That gets her a little more defensive because he's not _that_ old, and when she realizes Malcolm was assuming because of his hair she explains the white was from a freak lab accident, which then makes him feel bad for calling attention to it.

So okay, well, she can admit to herself that was a pretty bad first impression, but? She's stubborn?

So with enough doe eyes and 'it wasn't so bad' and 'he just needs to get to know you more' and 'c'mon, I know he can be a little rough, but he's been a really good friend to me' she convinces Malcolm to try joining her study sessions at least a few more times.

After all, he doooes want to spend time with her and Professor Fantamos did seem to help her quite a bit so… He supposes he can give the guy the benefit of the doubt if it means he doesn't have to make her choose between more time with him or free tutoring from someone she thinks highly of. And he figures he might have been kind of judgmental himself so yeah. Maybe if he's nicer, the professor will be nicer, too?

 

Nah. It continues to be really awkward between the guys and both of them hate it but smile and pretend everything is fine when she asks.

And over time Malcolm kind of starts getting the impression this guy has a thing for technically-not-his-girl-but-he's-basically-decided-she's-eventually-going-to-be-his-girl-so-same-difference.

And on one hand he's like "man they're so close, she's known him longer, why would anyone like me anyway?" ...But on the other... he's _old_ and _gross_ and.. and... Dammit all, Malcolm really likes her! SO! He starts getting a really deep jealous streak, and that starts building his inner fire.

He only ever intended to come back a few more times, and if he still couldn't stand the guy he'd just deal with a little less time around her and let her do her own thing. But as weeks turn into months, he keeps tagging along out of sheer _spite._

They both start getting really competitive... but in really subtle ways so as not to call attention to it. They get into long, deep, extremely philosophical arguments that never really have a winner, because the intent isn't to "win", it's just to make the other person look like a jackass.

Malcolm figures out that while Fantamos teaches science, he actually knows a lot about artistic subjects, too. So he asks him for "help" with different papers and stuff, aka attempts to show off what a badass he is.

Hamilton judges them as harshly as possible (... but can't deny he's legitimately a little impressed).

Malcolm rages over him being such a hardass about everything (...but can't deny that working to meet such ridiculous standards is making him that much better and on some level he's kind of enjoying that).

Their arguments, which Sheila had often just sat back and enjoyed, continue getting longer, but they start veering toward less heated and more deeply contemplative. At some point, when she's realized they're no longer arguing just for the sake of arguing but really sincerely care about the issues at hand, she starts joining them, and finds there are points where she can get them to collaborate against her. On their own they focus only on the points on which they disagree, and any agreements are brushed aside as unimportant. But when she challenges those points, either because she actually disagrees or just as a hypothetical, it creates an opportunity for them to see their similarities, as well as the finer nuances of why each feels the way they do.

They keep finding more common ground, and seeing both the worst and some of the best sides of each other, and there's still a feeling of deep- very deep- rivalry between them, but at some point it got laced with such a thick layer of respect? When did that happen…

 

Finally, one day, Sheila and Malcolm have ordered takeout and have plans to watch Night Court later, and while just sitting casually chatting, she works up her courage and asks if he's realized yet that she has feelings for Hamilton.

And his heart sinks a little as he admits, "I kind of wanted to ignore it, but I'm not surprised…" He IS a little disappointed but like... if he's gotta lose her to someone, there are worse options. Attempting to play it off, he smirks and adds, "Besides, I can totally admit that he's pretty hot, _for an old guy_."

She grins at the joke both for the intended jab and for rather more devious reasons, but just catalogues that away for the moment as she clarifies, "Yeah, sweetie, I wasn't trying to break up with you."

"Huh?" His eyebrow quirks will be the death of her, she suspects.

"Well… The thing is. I like both of you, _a lot_. And I was kind of wondering... if that was something you might be okay with?"

And, oddly enough, the main reason he feels weird about that is because it makes him wonder, wait. What have they been competing over this whole time, then? ... Well, like, _everything_ at this point, actually... It stopped being about her a long time ago, didn't it... He just likes having someone that challenges him so much.

...He _really_ likes it. ... _Shit._

For now he's just… awkwardly trying to ignore that realization as he tells her, yeah, that's... fine.

 

The next day she has a similar talk with Hamilton, who is a little more reluctant. Or at least, he makes more of a point to sound like he is. He's slightly bitter and doesn't reeeaally want to 'share' her, he hadn't necessaaarily thought of it like this, but... now that she brings it up, in retrospect it seems almost like an inevitability. He can see by now how much she cares for the boy, and- loathe as he is to admit it- he supposes he can even see why. As much as openly agreeing to share her affections sounds _dreadfully_ unappealing, the thought of breaking her poor whimsical heart sounds even worse. ...If _only barely._

Sheila is elated, and finally starts officially dating each of them. Her relationship with Hamilton is a secret to everyone _except_ Malcolm, of course. But they know about each other and that's all that matters.

And Malcolm even covers for them. He does his best to make sure they can have some private time, and if ever he hears any rumors about her going for teachers he's on them instantly. YOU WANNA SAY THAT TO MY FACE PUNK? Come over here when you insult my girl's honor. How DARE you.

Sheila's also sure to let Malcolm know she'd still be happy to play his wingman if he ever wants. Fair is fair, and all~ … He suddenly wonders how long she's been planning this, but doesn't say anything. Honestly he's not sure whether he feels played or really turned on by that possibility.

All in all, both are doing pretty okay with it, really. They've spent so much time already learning how to be civil and (usually) channel their rivalry into healthier outlets that there's not really much "adjustment" to be done. Knowing she's getting more physical more often with the other person doesn't really change their dynamic, it's just one more detail to incorporate. They complain about each other occasionally, but even that's not new. Sheila imagines it can only go uphill from here, and is very pleased with this outcome.

 

At some point, Malcolm is going to pick her up, and he walks in on them making out. They don't hear him at first, and when he clears his throat, Sheila, despite having nothing to 'hide', nearly jumps out of her skin. "I'm so sorry, I thought you weren't gonna be here for another half-hour." Then a delayed realization, "How did you even get in here?"

"Oh dear," muses Hamilton, unconvincingly. "I must have accidentally left the door unlocked." That smug smile doesn't really make Malcolm mad, though.

He just feels absurdly envious. Not 'jealous'. Just... holy _shit_ that was hot, (and he kind of wanted in). He's way too nervous to admit the entirety of that... But musters enough courage to assure them that they're fine, actually. ...And if uh… If he's early he'd hate to cut into their time, and all, so… if they want to just… go back to what they were doing, he could just… wait. … Or um… maybe even… watch? Because... holy shit.

Sheila is blushing furiously at this point and still catching her breath from the scare, so the mood is entirely gone, but that is uh… That's a really good thing to know for future reference. Next time he drops in uninvited, she might… take him up on that, if Hamilton is okay with it. He pretends to shrug it off, not admitting how excited he actually is.

 

The next time they get together for a study session- because Malcolm doesn't go to all of those anymore but they're certainly still a thing- Sheila and Hamilton end up flirting pretty heavily while Malcolm works on a paper for his lit crit class. She's _allegedly_ working on some physics thing, but the only gravitational force she seems to be interested in is the one slowly pulling her closer to him. ...Or something. Malcolm isn't a science kid. That joke probably made sense, he thinks to himself.

She's leaning over his desk now, trying to be coy. He's leaning in closer, but she suddenly realizes what she's doing and backs up a little, glancing over at Malcolm, who immediately pretends he wasn't staring expectantly. "Hey, don't mind me." In fact, he can help keep an eye on the door in case anyone comes by unexpectedly. Really, this is fine. Go ahead. (Please.)

So Sheila is equal parts embarrassed and giddy, but moves around the desk to sit in Hamilton's lap and starts making out with him, while Malcolm half-pretends to keep working on his paper for a few minutes before giving up and just watching them.

Hamilton _revels_ in this. In a way he feels like he's getting to assert his dominance- or maybe it's the idea of someone bearing witness to his prowess? Or? He doesn't even know _why_ exactly but it strokes his ego like crazy.

So they all agree that this is a good turn of events, and kind of get into that groove. It doesn't quite work the other way, and Hamilton prefers to leave them alone when she wants time with Malcolm, which is fine; she's all but moved in with him at this point and they get to spend plenty of time together at home.

But Malcolm really _really_ likes watching them go at it and they both have a hella exhibitionist streak. What little sense of a comfort zone there is gets pushed and expanded pretty rapidly, until one day Hamilton just turns to him and orders "Man the door" before bending her over his desk. Sheila flashes Malcolm a brief questioning glance and to her relief he is _very_ on board with this.

The first time it happens Malcolm manages- barely- to just watch, though he's all but dragging her away after in a desperate need to sate his own desires, now. (She's damn near insatiable and not really complaining.)

The second time, he can't help himself and starts jacking off to the sight of them. Hamilton _almost_ says something, but refrains and decides to focus instead both on pleasing her and on putting on a good show.

The rivalry aspect comes back into play as they each try to outlast the other as? some weird proof of their masculinity or something, maybe? Sheila doesn't get it but isn't even _slightly_ complaining.

 

As they continue meeting like this- sometimes in Hamilton's office during off hours, sometimes at one of their homes- Malcolm finds he's _still_ kind of envious. But he's also really enjoying this, so it should be fine, right? And it's not like she doesn't spend most nights with him, so he's not missing out on anything. If anything he's getting the way better end of this deal.

... so why does he still feel envious? It's not that he dislikes seeing her with someone else; he _loves_ it. It's not that he's upset he can't bang her; he can, and does, often. So what could it possibly…

. . .

OH,,

Well that's uh,,,

He um… Like… Okay, so crushing on hot guitarists or that cute guy from his painting class is one thing, but he didn't think his tastes veered quite... well, apparently they do. He has no idea how to handle this so he just tries to start awkwardly flirting with Hamilton at times?

And Hamilton's just ? He registers that it's awkward but it's not computing. Are you feeling okay, dear boy? Sheila, do you think Malcolm's behavior has been a little odd lately? What could be the issue? Strange... Oh well.

It takes Sheila a little too long to catch on, which is actually not technically all that long, but still long enough she's embarrassed. But she finally, delicately, asks him about it and Malcolm has a mild breakdown because AAAAAAHHHHH? but but and but and he and it but he never but the and WHAT DOOO?

And Sheila just holds him tight and does her best to calm him down and strokes his hair and ssssshhhh baby, it's okay, _I've got this_. |3

He's afraid to ask what she means but it makes him feel a lot better that at least someone knows and that she doesn't think it's weird, etc. So he tries not to give it too much more thought for the moment.

 

But the next time all three of them meet up, Sheila is like... God, do you know what I'd _really_ love to try?

We should have an actual threesome.

Of course, Malcolm is ! and Hamilton inherently wants to protest. ... but it's not like he hasn't been staring at this guy stroking his dick for the past several _months_ now so,,, And oh, he does simply melt when she makes those eyes at him, and hearing her moan is the most perfect sound in the world and if this will provoke that more, then,,,, okay he's willing to try it

That goes surprisingly well. She talks them into doing that a few more times, just getting them used to being so close, to actually touching in some positions, etc. Like when they started dating, it's a little jarring to realize just how subtle an adjustment they really have to make to get used to this. Both feel like it should be stranger than they actually find it, but the praise she lavishes on both of them makes it more than worth it.

 

So _then_ one day she asks… "Do you know what _else_ I really want~~~?" They're almost afraid to ask.

"You two should make out~"

As the words leave her mouth, Mal is just blushing furiously and panicking because he gets what she's doing now but she did _not_ warn him she was going to suggest this, and- omg? _omg?_

Meanwhile, Hamilton is- NO. No that's- He has to draw the line somewhere. He's fine with other stuff but something _so_ direct is just- ...too...

A mild sense of horror creeps over him as she gives him her best sad face, her best pleading eyes, and he knows he's already lost.

But,,,, n-no it's...Um… Well...

She makes a case that it's no fair that Malcolm gets to watch so much when _she_ likes being a voyeur occasionally, _too._.. And _imagine,_ they could get her helplessly turned on without even having to touch her! (... Oh no. Oh no that _does_ sound appealing _help_.) And besides, all she's asking is for them to just try it. Just once. If they don't like it they don't have to do it again. What could it _hurt?_

,,,,,,, okaaaaaay but just once. If it'll make her happy.

So Hamilton kind of rolls his eyes, and Malcolm swallows nervously, having been mostly silent through this, afraid to admit he actually is super curious and not wanting to seem too eager. So they start kind of slow and awkward... but it's not so bad, really. Not too much different than kissing her. Which is to say, awkward but not unpleasant by any means, at least. So in an effort to appease her whims they get a little more into it... and then the rivalry streak activates again.

And they each start trying to be a better kisser than the other.

And they completely forget she's watching.

And it's not until Malcolm starts trying to unbutton Hamilton's shirt that the latter snaps back to reality and pushes him away slightly, fixing his shirt (Malcolm should know by now he never undresses! The nerve!) and attempting to compose himself. Malcolm apologizes awkward, but they to to look at Sheila to find her legitimately stunned and beet red.

... Also someone needs to do her _immediately_ she doesn't even care which one, just. _Wow_. Please tell her they enjoyed that as much as she did because she _greatly_ underestimated how much she actually would.

Hamilton... 'reluctantly' admits he 'might not mind' doing it again, and by this point they've known each other long enough that it's not only Sheila who can see right through him. Malcolm just kind of grins sheepishly.

 

The next time they're scheduled to meet, she "accidentally" runs a little late. Only a little- _just_ long enough she knows they'll get impatient. And sure enough, she walks in to find they've started without her.

,,, out of, um.. Boredom? ... okay yeah that excuse is as flimsy as it sounds isn't-

... Gears start visibly turning for Hamilton and his expression slowly shifts until he turns to her, utterly appalled, wearing a look that practically screams: WAIT a minute… "You _planned_ this!" His accusation is utterly _outraged!_ … In the sense that he's speaking dramatically and his words are accusatory but he's like... still kind of running his hands through Malcolm's hair, and Malcolm kind of starts kissing his neck as Hamilton is saying this.

"Sheila, I am- I'm _disappointed,_ " he declares, before gasping at that last bite. "I cannot _believe_ you would be so-" He holds up a finger to indicate 'hang on' as Malcolm kisses his mouth again, and he greedily returns the kiss. "-so manipulative!"

Of course, Sheila just has the most satisfied grin as she casually asks, "So am I joining or watching today?"

 

So things naturally sort of progress from there as they start acting less like a vee and more like a triad. The boys are both really physically comfortable with each other, but… are they dating? EHH? Maybe? Probably at least kind of? They don't really think too much about labels, given it's not like they really have anyone to talk to their relationship about other than each other. If Sheila ever says "my boyfriend" she _always_ means Malcolm. When talking about Hamilton to each other they both just say Hamilton. And Hamilton is, as far as everyone else knows, still "single".

He's not entirely without suspicion. They're always very careful about who's watching as they're entering and leaving any given location, but there are still people who notice how much time he spends with those kids. They are, of course, exceptionally bright students- some of his favorites- and often help him as sort of unofficial aides. Yes, he does get along quite well with them socially, as well. Is there some problem with that?

If anyone ever pushes the question further, he scoffs and laughs. Those two are dating each other, after all. What? Does someone think he'd have an affair with one with the other always right there? Certainly THAT wouldn't be awkward. Or perhaps they think he's some kind of magical unicorn who wants to date both parts of a couple after having been single for his entire life up to that point, yes, that sounds TERRIBLY likely.

It sounds so ridiculous that it becomes a bit of a running gag with a few of the other faculty members. Sheila trying to find Hamilton for something and one of the other professors relaying "Hey unicorn, your princess was looking for you." It's funny because there's no way it could possibly be true, that such rumors ever existed is _hilarious_ and a great excuse to give him hell. Just in private or among others who already know the joke, of course; no one's actually looking to hurt his reputation.

 

As for the trio, they start doing all the cute things one would hope for from a triad. Any given two conspiring to surprise the other, and teaming up to lavish attention on whoever had a rough day, and keeping each other occupied if one person needs to be alone for whatever reason, and usually having a third party to help mediate when any two get into any kind of serious argument. Unless of course all three are arguing, or two ended up strongly agreeing and it wasn't enough to sway the third from their stance, 'majority rule' or not. Which happens. It's not perfect but it's nice.

In this reality, Malcolm never bothers arching Rusty full-time. Whatever happened to inspire that hatred, it still exists, and if Malcolm ever sees him in passing there's a moment of OH MAN hey help me do something to ruin this guy's day I HATE this guy. Or sometimes he'll think of him out of the blue and send him an envelope full of glitter and a small note reading "Have a shitty life, prick~" But meeting Hamilton when he did gave him a different target and different outlet for his general need for conflict, and having such a complicated social life left him a lot less time for his Rusty hate to fester and inspire grandiose ideas.

And of course, Malcolm and Hamilton still butt heads _a lot_ , in various ways. It's just, you know, as likely to end with one of them (usually Malcolm) lunging in for a kiss as it is with one of them storming off, now.

Hamilton can still get a little clingy, too, especially since they get to spend so much more time with each other than he does with either, and they're the couple everyone sees, which he understands is necessary, but it still sometimes makes him feel like the third wheel and he gets defensive to compensate. Malcolm actually isn't great at dealing with that outside of physical affection and a weak "it's not like that?" if/when it comes up so it mostly falls to Sheila to give meaningful reassurance.

Incidentally, the boys are both closer to her than they are to each other, in that they're both a lot more comfortable opening up to her about _most_ things (though they do find a few things that just feel more natural as 'guy talk'), and if they literally _had_ to choose it wouldn't take either an entire second to do so. (Her? Nah she'd split in half, probably.) But… well, they'd definitely still be _pissed_ if someone made them, and definitely still really enjoy having each other in their lives and are really happy with their dynamic.

 

So one day, Sheila and Malcolm are lounging around chatting about various things. He asks if she knows Hamilton's schedule today and she shrugs that he doesn't. He probably left work a while ago unless he got held up but she doesn't know where he is now or if he was planning on coming over today. They start wondering what he even does in his free time (aside from them, ahaha). Sheila's vaguely aware of some, like, business club he's a part of or something, but she doesn't know much about it and can't think of many other hobbies he wouldn't try to include one or both of them in. The more they talk about it, the more they realize it seems weird how much they don't know about him given they've been together so long at this point.

Hey, speaking of weird things they don't know, does she have any idea why he insists on staying fully clothed? He gets it when they're at a higher risk of being caught and need to be prepared to hide evidence at a moment's notice, but even at home he never so much as takes his shirt off? Does he have crazy scars or is he just that self-conscious or what's the deal?

Sheila admits she has no idea. He's always been like this and she stopped questioning. She's heard rumors before that he had robot arms or something? They've always felt real to her, but that's always been through sleeves (even in the summer- the _hot-ass_ desert summer) and that _would_ explain the gloves. It's _really_ weird that he won't take off the gloves, right?

Right? Malcolm never wanted to say anything because it seemed rude- Sheila agrees it definitely would have been- but they've both always kind of wondered.

And really, they were content for the _longest_ time (or, like, a year and a half or so?) to just shrug and accept that he must have his reasons. Like, Malcolm's got some various sensory issues himself so maybe it's something like that? Or maybe he's a germophobe, or maybe he's just… eccentric? They've had all these thoughts before privately and dismissed them but now that it finally came up between them, their curiosity is piqued and they just… They really want to know.

So...

They should probably just sit down and express their interest in the most tactful manner that they can, like reasonable adults, right?

… Nah. They can definitely come up with a way more fun idea.

 

So the next time they know for sure that Hamilton is coming over, he walks in to find the living room entirely rearranged and a lot of new equipment added, Malcolm chained to a wall, and both of them stark naked aside from various leather straps and the thigh-high stiletto boots Sheila is wearing. "You're just in time to join us," she coos. "But I'm afraid dungeon rules say no clothes allowed~"

… Hamilton purses his lips and quietly spins on his heels to march right back out the door. Both of them call for him to wait but Malcolm is still chained so Sheila has to go grab a robe as quickly as she can and then attempt to go outside after him in these awful fucking boots, pun intended, because taking them off would take too long.

And she just barely manages to catch him and he seems pretty upset and doesn't really want to talk about it, but she apologizes and promises they'll get dressed (and also dismantle the dungeon,,) if he'll just come back inside, they were just trying to have some fun.

So he comes back in and says they're actually fine- "In fact, I think I like him a bit better this way." He clearly means the restrained part. Sheila isn't sure whether to be amused or slightly insulted that he's indifferent to her but he insists that she's _always_ perfect so there's really no way to improve. Over on his wall, Malcolm rolls his eyes dramatically and groans, even while silently agreeing.

He does want to know what the hell they were thinking, though, and where all this came from, which prompts them to admit they were just trying to think of a creative way to get him out of his clothes, and subsequently explain that they were curious, etc.

"I see…"

So he contemplates this, debates the pros and cons, and decides they do both show a lot of aptitude… And he certainly knows they can both keep a secret.

So he begins to unbutton his shirt and in a sinister tone, answers, "Very well. Then tell me… What do you know of _evil?_ "

 

He tells them all about the Guild, and his side job as a villain, and it's a lot to take in, but Sheila is mostly understanding, and Malcolm… thinks this sounds like the coolest shit ever?

They both start #2-ing for him, but in this reality, they've been together longer and more explicitly beforehand than Sheila and Hamilton had been in the True Timeline. So the relationship is a bit stronger going in, but also, Malcolm and Sheila tend to work as a team, and Hamilton definitely doesn't treat Malcolm the way he'd be tempted to treat Sheila alone. So he doesn't put her on nearly as much of a pedestal. Similarly, he might doubt Malcolm's skills a little on his own, but he can't deny Sheila's for a moment. So with them watching out for each other, and him being a lot more used to trusting both / feeling less need to control her since she already has so much of an established life outside of him that he's aware of and okay with, everything is just a lot healthier. Whatever Hamilton lacks in quality time and emotional availability, Malcolm is more than happy to make up for.

Everything is nice and works out well. Malcolm can be a little bit resistant to following protocol and causes a fuss occasionally, but since he's not the one in charge and also doesn't have particular aspirations to be anywhere outside of where he is, he's a lot more willing to at least try most of the time.

24 is still a Shadowman and he and Malcolm end up becoming friends eventually. In general, Malcolm tends to like hanging out with the henchmen in his spare time, since he finds them less stuffy than Hamilton and even Sheila can occasionally be.

Somewhere off in the world, Gary is probably never kidnapped and never meets these people and that kind of breaks my poor little shipper heart, but this version grows up having a healthy normal childhood and gets to go to high school and we're gonna say he ends up making some good friends and- AHA NO WAIT. After high school he decides he should probably go to college, but his grades have never been the best- not for lack of knowing the material but just because standardized schooling doesn't agree with him at all. So like… eh, State isn't the best school but it's not the worst and it's close by.

And in this world, Hamilton is still teaching there; his partners have both graduated already. And at some point he takes notice of this kid who is deceptively bright and, although not his typical brand of 'freak', seems to have trouble fitting in. So he keeps an eye on him for a while and upon seeing some potential and a deep love for "super" things, he ends up recruiting him as a henchman.

So Gary still gets to be 24's best bro, and since Malcolm and 24 are already close when he gets there, starting to hang out with 24 means getting in with Malcolm pretty quickly and they become pretty good friends, too.

And Gary still develops a pretty strong crush on Queen Etheria because _wow?_ And has said crush for entirely too long before he realizes that she and Malcolm are also dating because _dammit no one tells him anything._

… But then wait. Wait so she's dating both Malcolm and the big boss? … Are they dating each other?

...Kind of.

...So is that like an open thing, or….?

Pff. Why, is he _interested~?_

… Maybe.

Well, good luck, kid. She's not all that likely to take notice of a random henchman though, especially if it means splitting her time even more.

…. Gary sheepishly admits he… didn't _just_ mean her.

…. O rly now?

 

Hamilton doesn't know _what_ they see in that henchman. Well, he can make an educated guess based on what he sees in him as a student, but he'd never imagined _this_ turn of events when he recruited him. … That said? Well. He _is_ very respectful and seems to do his best to not step on any toes, and they both seem so very smitten with him. He'd never admit it aloud, but it's pretty cute watching them fuss over the boy.

He supposes he doesn't mind sharing just a _little_ more.


	3. Sheila/Molotov

Since the sting operation was a huge bust, Sheila has resolved to find the Blue Morpho on her own, if need be. The OSI is still invested in his capture as well, but after turning the evening into a damn pool party, Sheila is hesitant to accept any more of their "help".

So what if, in the interest of remaining involved in the case but keeping as much distance as possible at the same time, the OSI offers the Council use of a particularly special agent, who has been of use to the Guild in the past, even. Molotov is nothing if not professional and works to the letter of her instructions exactly.

The Council as a whole is hesitant at best, but Sheila knows better than to judge a woman based on the fact that she weaponizes her sexuality, and it doesn't seem like anyone else is interested in listening to her, so she says sign me up.

As such, Mol becomes Sheila's personal agent in the shadows on her quest, and…

That goes exceptionally well?

What few reservations Sheila has are entirely just frustrations with the Guild and OSI and Blue Morpho overall, nothing personal, so she holds off on passing any sort of judgment until she sees Mol's skills in action, and said skills do not fail to impress. She follows orders and gets... Well, more results than anyone else had been, even if they are still running in circles to some extent and hitting a lot of dead ends. At least they're picking up some clues along the way.

Meanwhile, Mol comes in with no reason to bother with any judgments as long as she's getting paid, but after a while working together, she has to admit that she's becoming rather fond of the Councilwoman. She would have fit right in with Mol's Black Hearts, save for the fact that Mol may have questioned her own right to leadership with such a capable woman in the ranks.

They are both extremely practical and mostly pragmatic, and both are very strict about rules and protocol. As Sheila becomes more frustrated with the case, she becomes more willing to bend this and find a loophole around that, but Mol can see the reluctance and precision with which she does so. This is not a woman sacrificing her standards out of desperation, but a woman who has recognized the limitations presented by her current situation carefully crafting a path by which she hopes the ends will justify her means.

They work extremely well together, and Sheila gets a little bit spoiled by having someone so reliable at her personal beck and call.

 

During this time working together, things are SO smooth and professional that it's easy to miss from an outside perspective how compatible they are socially, as well. But they do notice themselves.

As mentioned, both are _usually_ pragmatic… but both have touchy or sentimental subjects. And both are surprisingly empathic, or at least 'surprisingly' from the other's point of view.

At first, when Sheila is particularly frustrated, Mol just offers tough words of encouragement. Curt, simple reassurances like "We can do this" and "He cannot hide forever". And Sheila appreciates it but it's… Just kind of Nice Words.

But then some day for whatever reason Mol is super off her game when they meet to discuss plans. Something happened or she's just sick, but she was in a rush this morning and didn't bother to squeeze into her usual outfit, so she shows up in sweats with her hair kind of a mess, a little bit irritable. But the first thing she does upon arrival is apologize for her appearance and assure the Councilwoman she's still fine for work, she just ran into a little issue.

But Sheila's bleeding heart cannot accept that and she's just, oh no you look terrible, c'mere and sit down, are you SURE you're all right? Did something happen? Do you need to talk about it or need time off? I can manage for a few days on my own if you do please tell me.

And suddenly Mol's perception is shattered, because she'd seen this radiant queen taking charge and getting shit done and she admired that, but it had never really occurred to her that underneath that front was this really very sweet and caring girl.

And once she sees it- once she knows to look- she can't unsee it and wonders how it wasn't more obvious. She starts hearing the hurt and compassion any time Sheila mentions the damage the Blue Morpho has done. She starts seeing how not just angry but _tired_ she is every time she gets frustrated over a false lead.

And having realized this, Mol starts letting her own guard down and being more casual and friendly when it's just the two of them, when there's not a pressing matter immediately at hand. She's still business first, but if they ever find themselves with downtime, Mol makes more of a point to be open to conversation, where before she'd stay quiet and observant.

When Sheila gets pissed off, Mol no longer sticks to niceties. She joins the venting, or offers more personal reassurances. A hand on her shoulder and reminding her no one is working harder to bring this killer to justice. Reminding her it's not her fault, and that it's okay for her to rest. That she needs to take care of herself, too.

And in general, they just start looking out for each other. Making sure the other is doing okay. Offering and asking for advice. Relying on each other a lot.

 

Regardless of how or when the Morpho case ends (the only thing I want to assume is that Sheila is still on the Council when it's all said and done), Sheila quickly decides to try to enlist Molotov's help with whatever she can from then on. Mol has a pretty nice set-up with the OSI atm and doesn't want to ruin that, but so long as Sheila's jobs don't directly conflict with or compromise the OSI in any way, well... Mol certainly can't see any problem at all with taking a few jobs on the side~ When this falls in relation to other events in this scenario is incredibly flexible, with only minor adjustments needed depending on how early or late it happens. So anyway.

 

They start spending more time together just because. Having Girls' Night Out or whatever. Of course, between the two of them, they attract a lot of unwanted attention. … _Mostly_ unwanted, anyway. Mol usually gets quite enough of being a Cocktease while dealing with suspects and witnesses and informants, but some days she's feeling particularly fiery and likes making desperate little boys squirm. And Sheila has to admit that can be fun from time to time- in particular, Mol tends to _make_ it a lot more fun than she'd have on her own- but there's also just… Occasionally, she legitimately likes the attention.

And Mol doesn't really see the difference or thinks she's just being nice until one night Sheila sees a guy she and the Monarch sort of know and she's like, hey, hey I don't wanna ditch you or anything but if it's okay I really wanna call my husband and see if he's okay with me bringing this guy home because _hot damn._ And this is so jarring to Mol? Like wait you actually _do_ sleep around then?

And Sheila tries to explain not technically, like not the traditional connotation of that- wait back up actually, is she saying she _doesn't?_ With a name like-

Yes, exactly, Cock _tease._ That's. That's the point, she's _just_ a tease. Mol isn't actually the slightest bit interested, she's demisexual. She just likes turning men's insistence on objectification against them.

And rather than this turning into a slut-shaming/prude-shaming thing, they both just find it _hilarious_ how similar they can be in some aspects while still being extremely different even in very closely related aspects. It makes both of them appreciate each other's differences that much more.

It also opens a door for discussion of their romantic and sexual orientations later, as well as their general comfort zones. Sheila considers herself pretty straight but is at least vaguely open to the idea of pretty much anything if it feels right in the moment, and Mol? Her probably-dead probably-ex boyfriend was the first person she ever felt specifically sexually attracted to, but she supposes it's possible she 'could' fall for anyone. Also, she's pretty much 100% okay with any sort of kissing or groping with pretty much anyone as long as she's in control and is getting something out of it. Sheila's a little more reserved in that regard, to Mol's surprise, in that she'd feel weird with strangers or whatever even if it was just a ruse. But as long as she knows someone, yeah, she doesn't mind getting really physical, either.

… Hey wait. Mol's ex is the only-...? Didn't she have a thing with _Brock Samson_ for approximately ever? ...Ah, yeah, that. That's kind of it's own thing? He turns her on in a way but she doesn't actually want to do him? Especially now. They've been getting along pretty well and there's no longer the whole cat-and-mouse appeal. _Hot damn_ if he doesn't make some nice eye candy, though. Sheila _enthusiastically_ agrees with that and they end up having a dumb self-indulgent conversation along the lines of 'mmm, Samson'. It is the most ridiculous and teenage-girl-ish thing either of them can recall doing in recent memory and they swear to never speak of it again but it was actually really fun.

 

One night, they're planning to meet up but Sheila arrives a good bit earlier and a guy hones in on her. She'd just kick his ass but she likes this place and doesn't want to cause a scene. Just telling him "sorry I'm taken" only elicits an "I don't see your boyfriend _here_ ". She's annoyed and realizes correcting him won't do any good but _oh thank God_ there's Mol.

So instead she just smiles and tells him, " _Girlfriend_ actually," and crosses the room to her and quickly mutters "Hey I need you to kiss me and be my girlfriend for a minute okay?" She motions with her eyes back at the guy who's still staring.

Mol understands and leans down to kiss her probably a little longer than necessary, then approaches the guy and leers with her one good eye, smiling sinisterly at him. "I hear you are giving my girl… how you say, _hard time?_ " Intentionally playing up her accent and whole I Am Scary And Russian angle and then watching him trip over himself scared as he excuses himself.

Sheila thanks her and apologizes that she had to ask that, but Mol shrugs it off. "Any time." … Wait, really? Well, sure, why not? It's not a big deal for either of them, is it? …. Good point. … Wanna be Hot Lesbians™ _every_ time they need to remind boys they're out of their league from now on?

Nyet! … Sheila finds herself more disappointed than expected, but Mol clarifies: not _every_ time. It depends where they are. But _some_ of the time? Hell yes.

 

So that becomes A Thing. And of course they're actually Just Friends, and it's just a game they're playing, just a physical thing, just for fun.

Just Friends as they continue spending more and more time together, getting more and more excited about doing so.

Just Friends when Sheila is having a terrible day at work and instead of a reassuring pat or a half-hug, Mol wraps both arms around her and leans Sheila's head against her chest and catches herself trying to place the scent of her hair.

Definitely still Just Friends when they decide to spend a day off binge-watching one of Sheila's favorite shows that she's trying to get Mol into and hasn't caught up with the latest season of herself yet, and spend the majority of that time snuggling because it's just comfier to watch that way.

And absolutely still Just Friends when Mol does something surprisingly clumsy and cute and tries to play it off in a cattish 'I meant to do that' sort of way and Sheila is so overcome by how ridiculously adorable she is that she just leans over and kisses her and then grins as that just makes her even more flustered and it doesn't even occur to her that there's no one else around and she had no 'reason' to do that.

There have been no less than two dozen audience-less kisses and at least three or four pet names granted to Mol by Sheila before finally one day they look at each other and go….. Wait. Shit when did that happen?


End file.
